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Семейные вопросы в США

Америка мне кажется впереди мира всего по решению некоторых щекотливых семейных вопросов.
Вчера прочитав NY Times узнала, что суррогатное рождение детей, которое так распространено и даже в моде в США, является криминальным преступлением в некоторых странах Южной Америки и многие едут искать маму в Штаты. В Европе  - эти вопросы сильно открыто не обсуждаются, поехали - родили и хорошо.
В Калифорнии же на этом уже строится бизнес, в этом году планируется 2000 детей и есть специальные компании, которые находят доноров, занимаются юридическими аспектами, хотя очень много моментов для общественного обсуждения, можно ли торговать своим чревом? Тем не менее в некоторых странах разрешено использовать только яйцеклетки суррогатной матери для оплодотворения ребенка, а в США с 1986 г, кода произошел инцидент с Baby M  и суррогатная мать отказалась отдавать ребенка, стали использовать яйцеклетку другой женщины, то есть она становилась просто носителем (опять же во многих странах это запрещено)

Удовольствие не из дешевых

International would-be parents often pay $150,000 or more, an amount that rises rapidly for those who do not get a viable pregnancy on their first try. Prices vary by region, but surrogates usually receive $20,000 to $30,000, egg donors $5,000 to $10,000 (more for the Ivy League student-athlete, or model), the fertility clinic and doctor $30,000, the surrogacy agency $20,000 and the lawyers $10,000. In addition, the intended parents pay for insurance, fertility medication, and incidentals like the surrogate’s travel and maternity clothes.

В общем столько мнений, есть дискуссия, можно ли сравнивать такой бизнес своим телом с древнейшей профессией. Кто-то считает, что надо использовать суррогатную мать по необходимости из-за проблем со здоровьем, возрастом или невозможностью родить (гей - пары), а не от того, что вот, не хочу свою фигуру портить.
Интересно послушать от друзей из Европы, какое мнение в европейских странах и насколько развито.
Как вы относитесь к суррогатному материнству?



















Photo
In February, Paulo and João of Portugal, where surrogacy is prohibited, went to Pennsylvania to meet their son, Diogo. CreditMatt Rainey for The New York Times

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At home in Lisbon, a gay couple invited friends over to a birthday celebration, and at the end of the evening shared a surprise — an ultrasound image of their baby, moving around in the belly of a woman in Pennsylvania being paid to carry their child.

“Everyone was shocked, and asked everything about how we do this,” said Paulo, who spoke on the condition that neither his last name nor that of his husband, João, be used since what they were doing is a crime in Portugal.

While babies through surrogacy have become increasingly common in the United States, with celebrities like Elton John, Sarah Jessica Parker and Jimmy Fallon openly discussing how they started a family, the situation is quite different in Portugal — as it is in most of the world where the hiring of a woman to carry a child is forbidden. And as Paulo and João have discovered, even bringing home a baby born abroad through surrogacy can be complicated.






In an era of globalization, the market for children crosses national borders; witness the longtime flow of Americans who have gone overseas to adopt babies from South Korea, China, Russia and Guatemala.




Other than the United States, only a few countries — among them India, Thailand, Ukraine and Mexico — allow paid surrogacy. As a result, there is an increasing flow in the opposite direction, with the United States drawing affluent couples from Europe, Asia and Australia. Indeed, many large surrogacy agencies in the United States say international clients — gay, straight, married or single — provide the bulk of their business.

The traffic highlights a divide between the United States and much of the world over fundamental questions about what constitutes a family, who is considered a legal parent, who is eligible for citizenship and whether paid childbirth is a service or exploitation.

In many nations, a situation that splits motherhood between the biological mother and a surrogate carrier is widely believed to be against the child’s best interests. And even more so when three women are involved: the genetic mother, whose egg is used; the mother who carries the baby; and the one who commissioned and will raise the child.

Many countries forbid advertising foreign or domestic surrogacy services and allow only what is known as altruistic surrogacy, in which the woman carrying the baby receives payment only for her expenses. Those countries abhor what they call the commercialization of baby making and view commercial surrogacy as inherently exploitive of poor women, noting that affluent women generally do not rent out their wombs.

But while many states, including New York, ban surrogacy, others, like California, welcome it as a legitimate business. Together, domestic and international couples will have more than 2,000 babies through gestational surrogacy in the United States this year, almost three times as many as a decade ago. Ads galore seek egg donors, would-be parents, would-be surrogates. Many surrogates and intended parents find each other on the Internet and make their arrangements independently, sometimes without a lawyer or a formal contract.

The agencies that match intended parents and surrogates are unregulated, creating a marketplace where vulnerable clients yearning for a baby can be preyed upon by the unscrupulous or incompetent. Some agencies pop up briefly, then disappear. Others have taken money that was supposed to be in escrow for the surrogate, or failed to pay the fees the money was to cover.

Surrogacy began in the United States more than 30 years ago, soon after the first baby was born through in vitro fertilization in England. At the time, most surrogates were also the genetic mothers, becoming pregnant through artificial insemination with the sperm of the intended father. But that changed after the Baby M case in 1986, in which the surrogate, Mary Beth Whitehead, refused to give the baby to the biological father and his wife. In the wake of the spectacle of two families fighting over a baby who belonged to both of them, traditional surrogacy gave way to gestational surrogacy, in which an embryo is created in the laboratory — sometimes using eggs and sperm from the parents, sometimes from donors — and transferred to a surrogate who has no genetic link to the baby.

But thorny questions remain: How much extra will the surrogate be paid for a cesarean section, multiple births — or loss of her uterus? What if the intended parents die during the pregnancy? How long will the surrogate abstain from sex? If she needs bed rest, how much will the intended parents pay to replace her paycheck, and cover child care and housekeeping?

“The gestational carrier has to agree to follow medical advice, but there has to be some level of trust,” said Andrew W. Vorzimer, a Los Angeles surrogacy lawyer who advises on many arrangements that have gone awry. “Once everyone goes home and the doors are closed, there’s no way to really monitor what’s going on.”

Since the Baby M case, the common wisdom has been that the main risk for parents is the surrogate’s changing her mind. But Mr. Vorzimer, who has tracked problem cases in the United States over the years, said it was the reverse: Trouble most often starts with the intended parents. One intended mother decided, well into the pregnancy, that she could not raise a child that was not genetically hers. Another couple, after a divorce, offered the surrogate mother money to have an abortion.

Over the decades, Mr. Vorzimer said, there have been 81 cases of intended parents who changed their minds and 35 in which the surrogate did — 24 of them traditional surrogates who both provided the egg and carried the baby.

Surrogacy remains controversial, even in the United States, despite the rapid proliferation of clinics, doctors and agencies. When all goes well, supporters say, the arrival of a baby to parents with no other path to a biological child is an unparalleled joy.







Photo
Thomas Reuss, in foreground, and Dennis Reuther of Germany, where surrogacy is illegal, found a surrogate in Pennsylvania two years ago for their son, Nico.CreditGordon Welters for The New York Time




Opponents tend to focus on the cases in which the surrogate suffers health problems or is abandoned by the intended parents, or in which the fetus has serious defects. Abortion politics hang heavily over the issue: Often, surrogacy involves twin or triplet pregnancies, with the possibility of selective reduction.

Critics sometimes draw an analogy to prostitution, another subject that raises debate over whether making money off a woman’s body represents empowerment or exploitation.

In Canada, as in Britain, payment for surrogacy is limited to expenses.

“Just like we don’t pay for blood or semen, we don’t pay for eggs or sperm or babies,” said Abby Lippman, an emeritus professor at McGill University in Montreal who studies reproductive technology. “There’s a very general consensus that paying surrogates would commodify women and their bodies. I think in the United States, it’s so consumer-oriented, so commercially oriented, so caught up in this ‘It’s my right to have a baby’ approach, that people gloss over some big issues.”

Germany flatly prohibits surrogacy, with an Embryo Protection Act that forbids implanting embryos in anyone but the woman who provided the egg. Ingrid Schneider of the University of Hamburg’s Research Center for Biotechnology, Society and the Environment said it is in children’s best interest to know that they have just one mother.

“We regard surrogacy as exploitation of women and their reproductive capacities,” Dr. Schneider said. “In our view, the bonding process between a mother and her child starts earlier than at the moment of giving birth. It is an ongoing process during pregnancy itself, in which an intense relationship is being built between a woman and her child-to-be. These bonds are essential for creating the grounds for a successful parenthood, and in our view, they protect both the mother and the child.”

With all that is known about adopted children’s seeking out their biological parents, other European experts say, it is wrongheaded to create children whose relationship with the woman who provided the egg or carried them will be severed.







Photo
They developed such a close relationship with the woman that she is now pregnant with their twins. CreditGordon Welters for The New York Times


Вся статья здесь

http://www.nytimes.com/2014/07/06/us/foreign-couples-heading-to-america-for-surrogate-pregnancies.html





Comments

( 13 comments — Leave a comment )
bleu_claire
Jul. 7th, 2014 06:26 am (UTC)
Моя американская хочет сестра уже второй раз суррогатная мама - пятая беременность, трое своих, близняшки два года назад уехали в Исландию, в это раз не знаю для каких родителей...
mylifedesign
Jul. 7th, 2014 06:32 am (UTC)
не поняла немного комментарий, твоя американская сестра рожает для кого-то?
bleu_claire
Jul. 7th, 2014 07:19 am (UTC)
Ага, это ее full time job ;)
efirnaja
Jul. 7th, 2014 08:57 am (UTC)
если бы это было не так дорого, и если бы такая опция существовала в моей стране (Польша), и если бы муж воспринимал это также как я, то я бы хотела не портить свою фигуру)
matriosha
Jul. 7th, 2014 09:27 am (UTC)
недавно отличную статью на эту тему читала в американском женском журнале, где приводят примеры женщин, серьезно занимающихся бизнесом или карьерой, и они не очень понимают, как встроить беременность в их жизнь, и вот в таких случаях они рассматривают суррогатных матерей

спросила у мужа, что он думает по этому поводу, он сказал, что если женщина не нашла время на беременность, как она надеется найти время на воспитание и занятия детьми? :)
karmen_vasaby
Jul. 7th, 2014 11:02 am (UTC)
муж просто гений, все правильно ответил))

Мне кажется суррогатом можно пользоваться только по медицинским показаниям, но никак не из-за "портить фигуру, карьеру"
mylifedesign
Jul. 7th, 2014 06:14 pm (UTC)
Я тоже склоняюсь к этому мнению, но про портить фигуру, селебритиз и актрисы этой фигурой работают, поэтому она им нужна, хотя многие конечно сами рожают все равно. Бывает возраст показатель, после 40 может уже не так безопасно рожать и фигуру тяжелее восстанавливать.
karmen_vasaby
Jul. 7th, 2014 06:17 pm (UTC)
После 40ка это уже скорее по медицинским показаниям, да.
mylifedesign
Jul. 7th, 2014 06:21 pm (UTC)
Там уже и финансово позволить могут. Я не думаю, что тема суррогатного рождения вообще появилась десяток лет из-за того что кто-то не хотел фигуру портить, это был выход по медицинским показателям, так что наверно суррогатные матери дают радость материнства многим людям
mylifedesign
Jul. 7th, 2014 06:10 pm (UTC)
Верно муж подметил)
__alenka__
Jul. 7th, 2014 12:31 pm (UTC)
это холиварная тема ;)) лично мне это противно. я не представляю, как можно с легким сердцем отдать новорожденного. я против чтобы детей рожали геям, из-за фигуры. плюс-минус соглашаюсь с медицинскими показаниями. НО - вполне можно удочерить / усыновить ребенка из детдома. он также будет рожден не данными родителями, но обретет родителей, будет счастлив. и выбор будет огромен, особенно в России - дофига брошенных детей
mylifedesign
Jul. 7th, 2014 06:12 pm (UTC)
Усыновлять хорошо и дешевле, но они видимо генетику свою еще хотят, кто может позволить суррогатное рождение
__alenka__
Jul. 7th, 2014 07:31 pm (UTC)
это да, особенно мужчины. для них это вообще "больной" вопрос, не зря столько запросов на днк-тесты именно от мужчин ;))
( 13 comments — Leave a comment )

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Алена Булатова
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